
Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.

7.2Filmmaker Adam Scorgie explores the illegal marijuana industry in British Columbia, revealing how the international business is most likely more profitable than it would be if it was lawful in this enlightening documentary. Marijuana growers, law enforcement officials, physicians, politicians, criminologists, economists and celebrities—including comedian Tommy Chong—shed light on this topical subject in a series of compelling interviews.
6.6A comedic, brutally honest documentary following self-destructive TV writer Dan Harmon as he takes his live podcast on a national tour.
5.9There's a crisis in the Chinese Spirit World -- humans don't believe in gods anymore! A Door God, facing unemployment, ventures into the human world to prove his worth, leading to unexpected encounters and transformations for humans and spirits alike.
2.9A group of friends unleash a demonic Pirate from a treasure chest.
3.2A reality TV crew visits Castle Daninsky to search for a hidden treasure in the dungeons. Instead of finding treasure, they unearth a tomb and unleash a cursed servant.
6.3Leroy, Reggie and Cheruce Paloni host a Halloween special full of spooky shorts from a group of up-and-coming animators.
7.5As the Allied forces approach Paris in August 1944, German Colonel Von Waldheim is desperate to take all of France's greatest paintings to Germany. He manages to secure a train to transport the valuable art works even as the chaos of retreat descends upon them. The French resistance however wants to stop them from stealing their national treasures but have received orders from London that they are not to be destroyed. The station master, Labiche, is tasked with scheduling the train and making it all happen smoothly but he is also part of a dwindling group of resistance fighters tasked with preventing the theft. He and others stage an elaborate ruse to keep the train from ever leaving French territory.
6.5China's deadliest special forces operative settles into a quiet life on the sea. When sadistic mercenaries begin targeting nearby civilians, he must leave his newfound peace behind and return to his duties as a soldier and protector.
5.6A deadly virus threatens to wipe out an entire Rocky Mountain town, leaving the town doctor to find some way to escape the soldiers who enforce the town's quarantine and devise an antidote. Matters take a more deadly turn after the physician is captured by a dangerously unstable band of militia extremists.
6.2High school graduation just wouldn’t be complete without an un-chaperoned, uninhibited and unforgettable final holiday. At least that’s what Will, Jay, Simon and Neil think when they book a two-week stay on an exotic Greek island. As their dreams of sun-drenched days and booze-filled nights are left hopelessly unfulfilled, the lads fight their way into the party scene with hilariously humiliating results.
6.2An evening of drunken prank calls becomes a nightmare for a pair of teenagers when a mysterious stranger turns their own game against them.
7.0A US Fighter pilot's epic struggle of survival after being shot down on a mission over Laos during the Vietnam War.
7.4Manhattan drag queens Vida Boheme and Noxeema Jackson impress regional judges in competition, securing berths in the Nationals in Los Angeles. When the two meet pathetic drag novice Chi-Chi Rodriguez — one of the losers that evening — the charmed Vida and Noxeema agree to take the hopeless youngster under their joined wing. Soon the three set off on a madcap road trip across America and struggle to make it to Los Angeles in time.
6.8In 1971, Stanford's Professor Philip Zimbardo conducts a controversial psychology experiment in which college students pretend to be either prisoners or guards, but the proceedings soon get out of hand. Based on a true story.
6.5Miles Logan is a jewel thief who just hit the big time by stealing a huge diamond. However, after two years in jail, he comes to find out that he hid the diamond in a police building that was being built at the time of the robbery. In an attempt to regain his diamond, he poses as an LAPD detective.
6.3En route to the honeymoon of William Riker to Deanna Troi on her home planet of Betazed, Captain Jean-Luc Picard and the crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise receives word from Starfleet that a coup has resulted in the installation of a new Romulan political leader, Shinzon, who claims to seek peace with the human-backed United Federation of Planets. Once in enemy territory, the captain and his crew make a startling discovery: Shinzon is human, a slave from the Romulan sister planet of Remus, and has a secret, shocking relationship to Picard himself.
6.3Johnny Knoxville and his band of maniacs perform a variety of stunts and gross-out gags on the big screen for the first time. They wander around Japan in panda outfits, wreak havoc on a once civilized golf course, they even do stunts involving LIVE alligators, and so on.
7.1Phillip is a wealthy quadriplegic who needs a caretaker to help him with his day-to-day routine in his New York penthouse. He decides to hire Dell, a struggling parolee who's trying to reconnect with his ex and his young son. Despite coming from two different worlds, an unlikely friendship starts to blossom.
5.9In the quiet family town of Suburbicon during the 1950s, the best and worst of humanity is hilariously reflected through the deeds of seemingly ordinary people. When a home invasion turns deadly, a picture-perfect family turns to blackmail, revenge and murder.
7.6During her wedding ceremony, Rachel notices Luce in the audience and feels instantly drawn to her. The two women become close friends, and when Rachel learns that Luce is a lesbian, she realizes that despite her happy marriage to Heck, she is falling for Luce. As she questions her sexual orientation, Rachel must decide between her stable relationship with Heck and her exhilarating new romance with Luce.
6.9When Leela is insulted by a group of space-rednecks (like regular rednecks, but in space), she enters the Planet Express ship in a demolition derby. Leela emerges victorious, but when she brings the damaged ship home, and the Professor sees the fuel gauge, he's enraged by the hit he's going to take at the Dark Matter pump. Now the crew have to find a way to break Mom's stranglehold on starship fuel, even if they have to wade through a Lord of the Rings-inspired fantasy-land to do it!
6.8Grumpy handyman Laco loses everything to a group of mobsters. Now wheelchair-bound and with his life spiraling, it's his new friend Gabo, a local Roma who helps Laco see things with a new perspective. Revenge is sweet.
5.6A prequel to the critically acclaimed series featuring Jerri Blank, a 46 year old ex-junkie, ex-con who returns to high school in a bid to start her life over.
4.7Unemployed cartoonist Gord Brody moves back in with his parents Jim and Julie and younger brother Freddy. When his parents demand he leave, he retaliates by spreading rumors that Jim is sexually abusing Freddy.
6.4Mary is a good Christian girl who goes to a good Christian high school where she has good Christian friends and a perfect Christian boyfriend. Her life seems perfect, until the day that she finds out that her boyfriend may be gay — and that she’s pregnant.
6.6A WWII military pilot makes a valiant effort to be certified insane in order to be excused from flying missions. But there's a catch.
6.0A revenge-seeking gold digger marries a womanizing Beverly Hills lawyer with the intention of making a killing in the divorce.
7.4Monty Python perform many of their greatest sketches at the Hollywood Bowl, including several from pre-Python days.
6.0A short satire by Ladislav Rychman on "mischief" in the authorities. The successor of the General Director of the Central Food Stores, who literally worked himself to death, is called Nekluda and comes from Liberec...
7.0A group of film students take three unemployed actors to an abandoned motel in the Norwegian mountains to make a zombie film. Fiction suddenly becomes reality when an unknown creature begins to terrorize the film set.
0.0A twisted fairytale drama about the world and the characters that surround the doll Barbie.
8.1After the insane General Jack D. Ripper initiates a nuclear strike on the Soviet Union, a war room full of politicians, generals and a Russian diplomat all frantically try to stop it.
6.9When the nefarious Dark Helmet hatches a plan to snatch Princess Vespa and steal her planet's air, space-bum-for-hire Lone Starr and his clueless sidekick fly to the rescue. Along the way, they meet Yogurt, who puts Lone Starr wise to the power of "The Schwartz." Can he master it in time to save the day?
7.5Shaun lives a supremely uneventful life, which revolves around his girlfriend, his mother, and, above all, his local pub. This gentle routine is threatened when the dead return to life and make strenuous attempts to snack on ordinary Londoners.
7.8King Arthur, accompanied by his squire, recruits his Knights of the Round Table, including Sir Bedevere the Wise, Sir Lancelot the Brave, Sir Robin the Not-Quite-So-Brave-As-Sir-Lancelot and Sir Galahad the Pure. On the way, Arthur battles the Black Knight who, despite having had all his limbs chopped off, insists he can still fight. They reach Camelot, but Arthur decides not to enter, as "it is a silly place".
8.3Dictator Adenoid Hynkel tries to expand his empire while a poor Jewish barber tries to avoid persecution from Hynkel's regime.
4.0The sheriff of a town plagued by an unstoppable killer Meets up with his nemesis one last time as a pair of survivors complicate matters for the worse. Who will be left standing and what will remain of their sanity?
6.7Peter Cook & Co. is a one-off sketch show special starring Peter Cook, with guest appearances from fellow comedians.



![The Onion Movie[armed gunman][english]](https://img.youtube.com/vi/1XFw1jRKRwQ/sddefault.jpg)