Onion News Empire

Follow That Bird(en)

Big Bird is sent to live far from Sesame Street by a pesky social worker, who thinks it would be better for him to live with other birds. Unhappy, Big Bird runs away from his foster home, prompting the rest of the Sesame Street gang to go on a cross-country journey to find him.

Turk 182!(en)

After New York City firefighter Terry Lynch is unable to receive any compensation for an injury incurred during the off-duty rescue of a young girl, he grows suicidal. Furious, his brother Jimmy attempts to have Mayor Tyler intervene, but the corrupt politician instead denounces Terry as a drunk. Determined to get justice, Jimmy begins a graffiti campaign of embarrassing slogans mocking the mayor, which soon captivates the city.

Khabardar(mr)

Bharat, a reporter, is given the opportunity to pursue the story of an escaped convict, Anna Chimbori. Maruti bears witness to a murder committed by Anna Chimbori and turns to Bharat for help.

Mark Thomas: Serious Organised Criminal(en)

Comedy that really makes a difference! This is Mark's true story of cake icing as a political weapon, of demonstrations to Defend Surrealism and getting to like the police. Mark turns an 18 month battle over Parliament Square and the right to demonstrate into bizarrely brilliant stand up. This is how Mark fought the law ... with the law's permission! It is a laugh out loud funny world inhabited by anarchists, Goths, artists and the Westminster Constabulary, in which Mark becomes a Guinness World Record holder, organises 2,500 protests in one day and changes the law in the process.

Zombies in Buenos Aires(es)

Paula works as a writer in "PN News", but she's warned that she'll be fired if her articles don't increase engagement. This pushes her to write a fake news story about a zombie invasion. The news goes viral, and the media goes into a frenzy. Paula tries to stop it, but it's already too late.

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues(en)

With the 70s behind him, San Diego's top rated newsman, Ron Burgundy, returns to take New York's first 24-hour news channel by storm.

TMZ's Merry Elfin' Christmas(en)

Over the holidays, TMZ will be dominated by some of the biggest names in Hollywood. Unwrap silly jokes and happy recollections from 2023 with TMZ's third annual retrospective of the year's best stories.

Breaking News(en)

A sensitive email is accidentally sent to an unsuspecting physical therapist.

Browsers(en)

Set in contemporary Manhattan, it follows four young people as they start their first jobs at a news website.

Infoholic(uk)

Maksim, an investing manager, is too busy reading the news in his social network feeds fails to notice his own problems, until the news really start to influence his own life.

Holmes & Watson(en)

Detective Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson join forces to investigate a mysterious murder at Buckingham Palace. It seems like an open-and-shut case as all signs point to Professor James Moriarty, the criminal mastermind and longtime nemesis of the crime-solving duo. When new twists and clues begin to emerge, the world's greatest sleuth and his trusted assistant must now use their legendary wits and ingenious methods to catch the killer as they only have four days before the queen becomes the next victim.

Thema Nr. 1(en)

The No. 1 topic is sex - at least in the group of four women who talk about men, affairs and that one thing in the evening.

Newsworthy(en)

Frederick Wiles, an ambitious, zealous high-school sophomore, with dreams of becoming the next Woodward or Bernstein, tries to find a story worthy of the seniors-only news show.

Sincerity(es)

After lunch, David must confess the news to his parents. What he still doesn't know is the impact it will have in them.

Out of Gitmo(en)

The dramatic story of a Gitmo detainee released from the controversial U.S. prison after 14 years. With NPR, a report on the struggle over freeing prisoners once deemed international terrorists. Also, the untold history of the Guantanamo Bay prison.

Christopher Hitchens: Believe Me, It's Torture(en)

When the renowned author, orator and journalist Christopher Hitchens was challenged to undergo the brutal interrogation technique known as waterboarding, few would've expected he'd accept such a task - he had previously expressed the position that the controversial procedure would not qualify as torture, and most who'd claim such a thing would not have the courage to test their convictions. Yet, in May 2007, Hitchens did just that - and his experience profoundly impacted both himself and his stance on the matter, prompting him to declare he'd been wrong, and later to publish his 2008 article for Vanity Fair's August issue, simply titled 'Believe Me, It's Torture'.

Knowing(en)

A teacher opens a time capsule that has been dug up at his son's elementary school; in it are some chilling predictions -- some that have already occurred and others that are about to -- that lead him to believe his family plays a role in the events that are about to unfold.

Network(en)

When veteran anchorman Howard Beale is forced to retire his 25-year post because of his age, he announces to viewers that he will kill himself during his farewell broadcast. Network executives rethink their decision when his fanatical tirade results in a spike in ratings.

Dangerous Lies: Unmasking Belle Gibson(en)

The real story of wellness campaigner Belle Gibson's massive worldwide fraud and the famous interview that brought the con artist down.

At the Edge of Russia(pl)

Alexei is a nineteen year old recruit being flown in to perform his military service on the frontier of northern Russia. The base is one of few such remaining outposts on the Arctic Ocean. There are five other seasoned and long serving soldiers stationed here, each with their own personal story or secret that has caused them to retreat from the real world. Their training and breaking in of the new arrival is sometimes humorous, at times harsh. Gradually, they each reveal something of themselves in their daily interactions and private moments as they continue their absurd duty in this snow covered no man's land, hundreds of miles from the nearest human settlement.

Fate(en)

Serial killers have plagued the American landscape for decades, committing gruesome atrocities, and providing some tough cases for criminal investigators to crack. Two detectives are on the trail of a bizarre murderer intent on slaughtering his victims, then using them as real-life puppets in a tale that he is trying to tell.

Showbiz: or how to become a celebrity in 1-2-3!(no)

A young boy named Espen Søplekladden is leaving home. He starts to work at a jazz café named "Balla Jazzhus". But his evil brother is trying to make everything bad for him.

Sonic 30th Anniversary Symphony(en)

30 years ago, on June 23rd, 1991, Sonic the Hedgehog was released on the SEGA Genesis, beginning a new era of gaming. Since then, Sonic has been running through countless zones, beating badniks, and saving the world with the help of his friends. This performance is to thank you, all of you, for being there every step of the way, and to remind us all of the amazing journey we've been on. Happy 30th Anniversary, Sonic!

Re-Births(fr)

A documentary film depicting five intimate portraits of migrants who fled their country of origin to seek refuge in France and find a space of freedom where they can fully experience their sexuality and their sexual identity: Giovanna, woman transgender of Colombian origin, Roman, Russian transgender man, Cate, Ugandan lesbian mother, Yi Chen, young Chinese gay man…

Fight Club: Members Only(hi)

Four friends head off to Bombay and get involved in the mother and father of all gang wars.

Happy Birthday!(en)

An unlucky Birthday boy must fight for his life against a masked psychopath.

Bring Me the Head of Lance Henriksen(en)

When '80s B-movie icon Tim Thomerson wakes up one day to realize the acting roles are not coming his way any more, he sets out on a quest to find his former co-star Lance Henriksen to discover his secret of Hollywood longevity and gets more than he bargained for in the process.

FAQ(ko)

Dong-chun, an elementary school student overwhelmed with seven afterschool learning academies, stumbles upon a mysterious bottle of rice wine during a school retreat. As the rice wine ferments and emits strange sounds like Morse code, Dong-chun sets out to unravel its identity and discovers the secrets of the world and the reasons behind her current way of life.

Bee Gees - Their Greatest Hits - The Record(fr)

ABC(sv)

16-year-old girls Alma and Bea had managed to lure the middle-aged football coach Carl into a changing room at the football club. They got him where they wanted. He wanted to see them naked. They wanted to see him suffer. They shouldn’t have done that, or should they?

Tangos e Tragédias na Praça da Matriz(pt)

123 Hugs(en)

If hugs are tangible why am I hugging the void

Tacoma(en)

On their last night of spring break, four old friends, now all college freshmen, realize their small town has more meaning than they ever imagined.

Gabriel's Rapture: Part II(en)

In the fifth installment of the Gabriel's Inferno series, Gabriel and Julia’s happiness is threatened by a conspiring student and academic politics. When Gabriel is confronted by the university administration, will he succumb to Dante's fate? Or will he fight to keep Julia, his Beatrice, forever?

Woman(pt)

The Botanical Avatar of Mademoiselle Flora(fr)

A young woman lives sadly in a small garrison town with a soldier. Little by little, won over by boredom, sadness, total inaction, she develops a relationship with plants and starts talking to plants.