The children of Mars are in a funk, and nothing on the red planet seems to be able to cheer them up. Martian King Kimar comes up with the only reasonable solution: kidnap Santa Claus from Earth's North Pole and bring him to their planet to make toys for their joyless, listless little green kids. Meanwhile, two Earth children get wise to the plan and are abducted along with Santa to prevent them from talking to the authorities. Luckily for them, Dropo, the Jerry Lewis of the fourth planet from the sun, is there to help them. The fiendish plot doesn't go according to plan, and there's plenty of intrigue, double-crossing, mistaken identity and stock footage for kids of all ages and planets to enjoy. Poorly conceived, sloppily made, and unfailingly bizarre, "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" is the ultimate Christmas movie-riffing classic (as fans of MST3K know) which is why Cinematic Titanic chose to revisit, re-riff, and release this holiday hamfest with all new jokes. Merry Crap-mas!
Himself
Himself
The children of Mars are in a funk, and nothing on the red planet seems to be able to cheer them up. Martian King Kimar comes up with the only reasonable solution: kidnap Santa Claus from Earth's North Pole and bring him to their planet to make toys for their joyless, listless little green kids. Meanwhile, two Earth children get wise to the plan and are abducted along with Santa to prevent them from talking to the authorities. Luckily for them, Dropo, the Jerry Lewis of the fourth planet from the sun, is there to help them. The fiendish plot doesn't go according to plan, and there's plenty of intrigue, double-crossing, mistaken identity and stock footage for kids of all ages and planets to enjoy. Poorly conceived, sloppily made, and unfailingly bizarre, "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" is the ultimate Christmas movie-riffing classic (as fans of MST3K know) which is why Cinematic Titanic chose to revisit, re-riff, and release this holiday hamfest with all new jokes. Merry Crap-mas!
2008-11-20
8
Winner of 7 Tony Awards, including Best Musical, The Wiz was a massive Broadway hit which spawned a dismal feature film starring Diana Ross and Michael Jackson. Executive Producers Craig Zadan and Neil Meron have assembled a Tony-winning creative team, the imaginative Cirque du Soleil Theatrical and a diverse cast of showstoppers designed to create an eye-popping new take on the musical unlike anything ever seen.
Harry Potter has lived under the stairs at his aunt and uncle's house his whole life. But on his 11th birthday, he learns he's a powerful wizard—with a place waiting for him at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. As he learns to harness his newfound powers with the help of the school's kindly headmaster, Harry uncovers the truth about his parents' deaths—and about the villain who's to blame.
The story of J. Robert Oppenheimer's role in the development of the atomic bomb during World War II.
Spanning the years 1945 to 1955, a chronicle of the fictional Italian-American Corleone crime family. When organized crime family patriarch, Vito Corleone barely survives an attempt on his life, his youngest son, Michael steps in to take care of the would-be killers, launching a campaign of bloody revenge.
After reuniting with Gwen Stacy, Brooklyn’s full-time, friendly neighborhood Spider-Man is catapulted across the Multiverse, where he encounters the Spider Society, a team of Spider-People charged with protecting the Multiverse’s very existence. But when the heroes clash on how to handle a new threat, Miles finds himself pitted against the other Spiders and must set out on his own to save those he loves most.
After being bitten by a genetically altered spider at Oscorp, nerdy but endearing high school student Peter Parker is endowed with amazing powers to become the superhero known as Spider-Man.
Year three at Hogwarts means new fun and challenges as Harry learns the delicate art of approaching a Hippogriff, transforming shape-shifting Boggarts into hilarity and even turning back time. But the term also brings danger: soul-sucking Dementors hover over the school, an ally of the accursed He-Who-Cannot-Be-Named lurks within the castle walls, and fearsome wizard Sirius Black escapes Azkaban. And Harry will confront them all.
Led by Woody, Andy's toys live happily in his room until Andy's birthday brings Buzz Lightyear onto the scene. Afraid of losing his place in Andy's heart, Woody plots against Buzz. But when circumstances separate Buzz and Woody from their owner, the duo eventually learns to put aside their differences.
Batman raises the stakes in his war on crime. With the help of Lt. Jim Gordon and District Attorney Harvey Dent, Batman sets out to dismantle the remaining criminal organizations that plague the streets. The partnership proves to be effective, but they soon find themselves prey to a reign of chaos unleashed by a rising criminal mastermind known to the terrified citizens of Gotham as the Joker.
Cobb, a skilled thief who commits corporate espionage by infiltrating the subconscious of his targets is offered a chance to regain his old life as payment for a task considered to be impossible: "inception", the implantation of another person's idea into a target's subconscious.
Imprisoned in the 1940s for the double murder of his wife and her lover, upstanding banker Andy Dufresne begins a new life at the Shawshank prison, where he puts his accounting skills to work for an amoral warden. During his long stretch in prison, Dufresne comes to be admired by the other inmates -- including an older prisoner named Red -- for his integrity and unquenchable sense of hope.
To put their demons to rest once and for all, Josh Lambert and a college-aged Dalton Lambert must go deeper into The Further than ever before, facing their family's dark past and a host of new and more horrifying terrors that lurk behind the red door.
After accidentally crash-landing in 2022, time-traveling fighter pilot Adam Reed teams up with his 12-year-old self on a mission to save the future.
Cars fly, trees fight back, and a mysterious house-elf comes to warn Harry Potter at the start of his second year at Hogwarts. Adventure and danger await when bloody writing on a wall announces: The Chamber Of Secrets Has Been Opened. To save Hogwarts will require all of Harry, Ron and Hermione’s magical abilities and courage.
In the 22nd century, a paraplegic Marine is dispatched to the moon Pandora on a unique mission, but becomes torn between following orders and protecting an alien civilization.
Puss in Boots discovers that his passion for adventure has taken its toll: He has burned through eight of his nine lives, leaving him with only one life left. Puss sets out on an epic journey to find the mythical Last Wish and restore his nine lives.
Robert McCall finds himself at home in Southern Italy but he discovers his friends are under the control of local crime bosses. As events turn deadly, McCall knows what he has to do: become his friends' protector by taking on the mafia.
A man with a low IQ has accomplished great things in his life and been present during significant historic events—in each case, far exceeding what anyone imagined he could do. But despite all he has achieved, his one true love eludes him.
After getting a taste for blood as children, Hansel and Gretel have become the ultimate vigilantes, hell-bent on retribution. Now, unbeknownst to them, Hansel and Gretel have become the hunted, and must face an evil far greater than witches... their past.
A young French teenage girl after moving to a new city falls in love with a boy and is thinking of having sex with him because her girlfriends have already done it.
A narcissistic TV weatherman, along with his attractive-but-distant producer, and his mawkish cameraman, is sent to report on Groundhog Day in the small town of Punxsutawney, where he finds himself repeating the same day over and over.
Isobel Gray plans a storybook Christmas with her boyfriend, including a snow-covered cottage in the Northwest, and a carefully composed bucket list of classic holiday traditions. But when the boyfriend goes AWOL, the list proves challenging and a tempting new romance turns her life upside down. Will Isobel have a White Christmas ending under the mistletoe?
Scooby-Doo and the gang participate in a toy store's holiday parade where they discover the abandoned haunted clock tower with a troubled past. A sinister snowman haunts the streets and accompanied with a large blizzard, threatens to close down the toy store for good.
Monsieur Hulot, Jacques Tati’s endearing clown, takes a holiday at a seaside resort, where his presence provokes one catastrophe after another. Tati’s masterpiece of gentle slapstick is a series of effortlessly well-choreographed sight gags involving dogs, boats, and firecrackers; it was the first entry in the Hulot series and the film that launched its maker to international stardom.
The comic mishaps and adventures of a young boy named Ralph, trying to convince his parents, teachers, and Santa that a Red Ryder B.B. gun really is the perfect Christmas gift for the 1940s.
After the death of his mother, a young boy calls a radio station in an attempt to set his father up on a date. Talking about his father’s loneliness soon leads to a meeting with a young female journalist, who has flown to Seattle to write a story about the boy and his father.
Young love and childish fears highlight a year in the life of a turn-of-the-century family up to the 1904 St. Louis World's Fair.
When Billy Peltzer is given a strange but adorable pet named Gizmo for Christmas, he inadvertently breaks the three important rules of caring for a Mogwai, unleashing a horde of mischievous gremlins on a small town.
In this East German teen musical, a group of girls are planning to take their summer vacation together on the Baltic coast. When a loud and obnoxious group of boys intrudes on their holiday, the girls are horrified to learn that the boys have the same vacations plans as them. The two groups quarrel with each other and compete over a number of things, but gradually an attraction starts to form.
Two women, one from the United States and one from the United Kingdom, swap homes at Christmas time after bad breakups with their boyfriends. Each woman finds romance with a local man but realizes that the imminent return home may end the relationship.
Various experiences of childhood are seen in several sequences that take place in the small town of Thiers, France. Vignettes include a boy's awakening interest in girls, couples double-dating at the movies, brothers giving their friend a haircut, a boy dealing with an abusive home life, a baby and a cat sitting by an open window, a child telling a dirty joke, and a boy who develops a crush on his friend's mother.
Jaded rock star Dax is found by New York paparazzi passed out in his car with a frozen holiday turkey in the passenger seat. In order to repair his tarnished image, Dax publicly agrees to grant a fan’s “Dear Santa” Christmas wish. To his dismay, his manager Jason drops Dax off in Cedar Grove, a Midwest small town, where he’s committed to spend a week and perform in a local holiday Christmas concert.
We are in 2012, life goes on. Children are born, people die and things happen in between. Nevertheless, this society has its strange particularity, it has never known laughter. In this world, nobody has ever laughed. Neither humor nor derision exist. Until a psychoanalyst meets a patient with a strange illness.
Tobi and Achim, the pride of the local crew club, have been the best of friends for years and are convinced that nothing will ever stand in the way of their friendship. They look forward to the upcoming summer camp and the crew competition. Then the gay team from Berlin arrives and Tobi is totally confused. The evening before the races begin, the storm that breaks out is more than meteor-logical.
Crustacés et coquillages is a fresh French comedy film with numerous surprise turnarounds and about the tolerance of a family of four. The family spend an idealistic summer vacation together where each of the family members gets involved in a new or old relationship.
Winnie's life is less than wonderful one year after saving her town from a psychotic killer on Christmas Eve. When she wishes she was never born, she finds herself magically transported to a nightmarish parallel universe. With the murderous maniac now back, she must team up with a misfit to identify the culprit and get back to her own reality.
A tour guide named "Noor" travels to Sharm el-Sheikh with his family to take the advantage of an offer provided by a company to spend a honeymoon in order to meet an Italian girl named "Perla". He finds there a girl named "Layla " staying in the same villa . By the time Noor's family allied with "Layla " to discourage him from developing a relationship with "Perla".
Eight-year-old Kevin McCallister makes the most of the situation after his family unwittingly leaves him behind when they go on Christmas vacation. When thieves try to break into his home, he puts up a fight like no other.